Urban Fantasy

Saturday, April 16, 2005

New Blog

OK kids. I'm tired of this blog, since it has a lot of negativity, whining and incredibly stupid work-related ramblings on it. Therefore, I will no longer be writing it, and will disavow all knowledge of it if confronted by members of the media.

Check out ejtakeslife.blogspot.com for much for interesting writing/linking goodness.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

You're Going to Have to Make a Few Compromises

I'm back from Europe. Nothing and everything is different. I really, powerfully, achingly miss Europe, and yet all too easily remember how much I ached to be home those last few days where everything was going wrong. If this trip was a voyage of self-discovery, as one reader so cheesily referred to it, then I'm pretty sure I washed up on Discontent Depressive Island by the end. Not in like a life-ending way, don't worry; in the "what if I'm never actually happy no matter what I'm doing with my life?!" kind of way. This means a lot of listening to Avenue Q and reminding myself that no one, but no one, actually likes their lives a great deal. There's also been a lot of sleeping and watching TiVo'ed episodes of Dawson's Creek, because that is a bitter, bitter pill to swallow.

I also developed an even stronger propensity for clunky metaphors. Not speaking English on a regular basis for 2 months makes a girl a little rusty.

So I'm looking for a job, which is just always a total hoot. So far, I have interviewed with a teeny industry newspaper whose editor accused me of leaking secrets during my last job, and with a higher ed firm for a job that would be absolutely freaking perfect for me. However, Said Firm has declared the work, despite being exactly what my mother's colleague with a master's in PR and five years experience does, to be an internship. As in, small stipend, no benefits, with a humiliating title. As in, the exact same scenario I was supposed to never encounter again after The Job That Must Not Be Named.

At least I'm temping for a while at X's firm, doing data entry. The great irony of professional life is that monkey work will get you ten bucks an hour, but challenging marketing work that requires a unique skill set and phenomenal people skills is considered an internship. Perhaps the Cabinet positions will next be considered internships. I know a lot of International Affairs tools at GW who would gladly sign up, but of course only if they can get class credit for being Secretary of State.

I miss Europe. It didn't matter if I was an intern there. People still liked to talk to me and get drunk with me. Rawr.

Monday, February 07, 2005

Fun With Links and Righteous Indignation

During the Job That Must Not Be Named, I read a lot of blogs. Most of them were funny, some of them were touching and intelligent, all were snarky and bitter as hell. One of my favorites effectively sums up much of what is wrong with my fair city. However, recent events prove that when Red Staters bitch about what those Crazy Politicians are doing with Our Tax Dollars in Washington, the real waste of time is happening just over the river with our bucktoothed, inbred bastard stepchild of a neighbor:

1. Bigots just do not get enough support in our public schools. No seriously, they have feelings too!

"Heather, thank you for bringing your family photo album and your mommies to Show and Tell. Now, Cletus will tell the class why he thinks you should all burn in hell."

Please bear in mind that this is in Fairfax. Not some slackjawed yokel district on a mountainside, but Fairfax County.


2. For when your bumper isn't adequate to express your hatred of the gays.

Isn't it great? When you're driving Cletus and Bobbie Sue Betty Jo Ann to the shootin' range after their public-school sanctioned queer-bashing, no one will mistake you for another liberal homo-lovin' pansy ass Commie Jew! Just in case your "God Hates Gays" and "Neener-Neener, You Can't Buttfuck in the Bonds of Matrimony" bumper stickers left any room for debate, this lovely license plate will clear matters up!

I mean really. Can these people find no other way to spend their time? I can think of a few pressing concerns.


Friday, February 04, 2005

I'm Not Bitter, Just Have Too Much Time to Think

Can we please discuss the annoyance that is the second-most recent issue of Time magazine? The one with the cover of the mild-looking 20something white guy sitting in a a teeny sandbox and a blaring headline screaming "THEY JUST WON'T GROW UP!" Apparently, Time believes that the real threat to this nation is not internation terrorism, not a sharply divided cultural landscape that can't agree on anything, nor the total inability of our President to utter multisyllabic words. Nay, our great nation will be internally ruined by... overeducated 20somethings who don't know what they want to do with their lives!

Perhaps my sensitivity to this topic is because I am off the employment train, at least temporarily. I realize, as I write this, that I fulfill all the stereotypes about the "Twixter." I am currently without job, am sitting in my parent's house on a Friday afternoon (wearing my mother's really excellent new bathrobe), blogging at 3:22 PM.

However, this was not always the case. When I couldn't find a job right out of college, despite having the most overpolished resume of anyone I grew up with, I worked retail until taking the first job that came my way. I scrimped and saved, paid my own way for everything, and bit my lip to do the best at my job despite the barrage of verbal abuse hurled at me daily. Point is, I did the grownup thing. Even now, the circumstances are temporary, and I will continue to do the grownup thing as soon as I possibly can.

I wound up in a lousy situation partly because the work ethic I grew up with told me to take whatever job came along and be damn grateful for it. I admit that I was attracted by the shiny, boldface names, names that caused me to throw caution to the wind and ignore the little voice in my head that was whispering "This is The Devil Wears Prada, only the shoes aren't as cute!"

And so, Time magazine, you can take your criticism of my generation and shove it up your geriatric ass.

Sunday, January 30, 2005

Deja Vu All Over Again

Phew! I haven't good-ol' fashioned made out with a boy in months! That was refreshing!

Is it wrong that I only did it because he reminded me entirely of my high school boyfriend? To the point where I kept calling him "Sean?" I don't think he cared for that.


Friday, January 28, 2005

The Feisties are Moving!!!

Visit ejtakeseurope.blogspot.com for all sort of European backpacking goodies

Monday, January 24, 2005

19 Days to Go...

Critical flights/hostels reserved? *Check*

Purchased backpack, hiking boots and overpriced yet extremely practical coat? *Check*

Combed Craigslist in search of short-term work (not inc. nudity) I can perform for extra cash? *Check*



Freaking the f*ck out? *Check*